By 
“I am very proud of the longevity of my marriage, my children and my
grandchildren. If you don’t have that, you don’t really have much. “-Bob Newhart
Last week we got the news that actor Jude Law cheated on his beautiful
fiancee, actress Sienna Miller, with her children’s babysitter. Tea
story, which made international headlines, was the subject of a special
Segment “Best Week Ever” on the Today Show with Katie Couric.
Sherrod Small, a BW panelist, explained Law’s behavior to Katie. “He is a
man, “he opined.
Which raises two questions: Are men programmed to cheat? And, if a
woman with Sienna Miller assets can’t keep a faithful man, what hope
Is there for the rest of us?
My answer to the first question is a resounding no. Men are not
programmed to cheat, but every time someone comes along and says they are
(I’m thinking of Goldie Hawn in a recent People interview), the bar
its going down. Women begin to believe that men are incapable of fidelity,
and they stop expecting it.
Men are capable of monogamy. If you want a monogamous relationship,
expect monogamy. Don’t make excuses and don’t accept a guy after
cheated on your best friend. It doesn’t matter if you look
Like Sienna Miller, if you get a cheater, you get a cheater. (His
It’s also not a good idea to poach other women’s men; you don’t walk away
with a prize, you know; you have a guy who will break you
heart one day).
To prove my point, a retrospective of Bob Newhart’s career was last aired.
week on PBS two days after the reveal about airhead Jude Law.
Now you might think Bob Newhart is an old man, not very sexy, no Jude
Law, but in 1963, when he married his wife, Ginny, he certainly did not
bad (and makes people laugh, really exciting).
Much of the show was about her marriage and her devotion to her
wife and children. At one point, Newhart and his wife were shown
sitting together in the audience at a recent awards ceremony looking wrinkled
and in love. (Lest you wonder if old Bob cheated on Ginny while
on the road, she arranged her schedule so that she and the children
I could go with him.)
Another example of a happily monogamous man is Joe Perry of Aerosmith.
He and his wife Billie were married in 1985. Since then, he has not left.
home unless she’s on board, and he’s still writing songs about her (check
releases his new CD, “Joe Perry”).
Isn’t that what we all want when we set out to get married? To be loved
for being ourselves, for achieving goals with the man we love, for being
she was allowed to grow old with him gracefully, to sit happily across the table
of him in 20, 40 and 60 years?
So, set your bar high. Forget men like Jude Law. Wait a
Bob Newhart or Joe Perry. They exist and you deserve nothing less.