By 
Once upon a time, you would only see older workers managing younger workers, NOT ANYMORE! And boy does this create tension in the workplace. Since the publication of our book, Bridging the Generation Gap, Linda and I have continued to receive calls from publications and organizations asking “how can we make the relationship between a younger boss and an older worker develop harmoniously?” As I tell my two children, it takes two to tango and in this case it will take two for this relationship to work.
The first step to making the relationship between the younger boss and the older worker work is to accept the situation as it is and stop kicking and yelling! The youngest boss is the boss and he wouldn’t be the boss if he wasn’t qualified, diapers or no diapers. At the same time, a boss is only as strong as his direct reports. The younger boss needs to respect the older worker for the years of experience and knowledge he brings to the table, which will help the team shine, with or without dentures. If both individuals can accept that they each have something unique to contribute, then a major hurdle will have been overcome.
A second hurdle that needs to be overcome is RESPECT in general! Too often, in any given situation, the young make the old feel “old” and the old make the young feel like kids out of their sandbox. There is no place for this in the workplace. Younger workers may want a sense of family, but they aren’t looking for parents. In fact, the younger generations call these floating “pseudo parents”: helicopter parents. Younger workers, including younger bosses, don’t want older workers to take them under their wing and treat them like children, and they don’t want jokes or comments that make them feel like children still in “diapers.” Likewise, older workers also want to be treated with respect. They want respect for their years of experience, and they want younger workers to know that their brains still work. Older workers want to share their experiences so you don’t have to recreate the wheel. Skip comments that make them feel like they are so old they need to be put out to pasture.
Another key issue that must be overcome for the younger boss/older worker relationship to work is communication. Yes, actually we all speak the same language; it’s just that the method, timing and frequency of communication can vary greatly depending on the generation. Therefore, it is important to clarify the communication styles of the younger boss and the older worker early on to ensure that both individuals are on the same page. For example, younger generations tend to use instant messaging and email much more frequently, while older generations generally like face-to-face or phone conversations. Older generations are more likely to want to collaborate on problems, which requires more communication versus younger generations who take a more independent approach that requires less communication or simple email updates. Finally, both generations must agree on how to handle communications outside of business hours. You may find a very different opinion between the generations on this subject, but knowing the opinions will prevent any conflict.
Finally, as a member of Generation X, I managed older workers myself and watched my peers do the same. There are some very basic steps you can take that will make you a more successful young boss and see you as a partner rather than the child in “swaddles.” For starters, your first impression is absolutely critical. You have to dress like a leader: dress to impress, but not too much. This means that you need to be dressed one step ahead of everyone else you supervise. Come prepared with a plan, but include your team in the plan, either by meeting with them as a group or by connecting one-on-one, depending on your comfort level or group dynamics. Then, set very clear expectations with each of your direct reports so that you’re both on the same page working toward the same goals. This direct communication also helps avoid conflicts in the future. Finally, don’t make the older generations adjust to you; respect them for their way of being. Your generational differences will reveal unique perspectives and ideas that you might not think of.
Having often worked with older workers and through our research for Closing the Generation Gap, we learned many ideas for helping older workers as well. The first and most difficult step will be letting the younger boss drive, even if it’s different than you would. Second, turn on those listening skills and really listen to what the younger boss has to say. In general, younger workers are very connected to the mission and vision of the company, with which we can all identify; You’ll be able to connect too, I promise. Be prepared for a very practical management style, and identify ways that will help you work with this type of style. For example, try using email a bit more. Finally, meet the younger generation. Linda Gravett said that immersing herself in some of the periodicals, websites, and television shows that younger generations like helped her better understand and relate to us.
Remember, whether you are the younger boss or the older worker, you both work for the same company with the same vision, mission, and goals. You are serving the same customers. Everyone may do things a little differently, but your end results will be the same. The key is that by working together you can be more successful, whether or not you belong to the diaper or denture generation.