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Have you gained, say, 10, 15, or 20 pounds since you got married, either from raiding the fridge late at night or from having children? Do you think you don’t have to make the effort since you already have it?
Well, Ellen Fein and Scherrie Schneider say that’s a no no. In fact, they tell women to keep exercising and hang out with their friends because men don’t want to come home all the time with a woman in a bathrobe or curlers in their hair.
You see, men love to look at pretty things… those pretty things include lingerie, shiny new sports cars, expensive Brooks Brothers suits… and most importantly, the woman they love: you!
Do you remember when you first put it on, you tried your best to show your best face? What was that for? Ok, give up? I’ll tell you: it’s because you cared what he thought of you. You wanted him to appreciate your physical beauty and you wanted him to think you were the sexiest babe in town! You wanted to impress him. Ok, so the critics can argue that those are superficial reasons for self-care. I disagree. My philosophy is: whatever motivates you to pamper yourself, do it. The results are equals. You look and feel like a million bucks.
Unfortunately, when women start a relationship, they start to neglect their appearance. They gain weight, they stop shaving their legs, they no longer wax their groins and they let their gray hair grow. Before you know it, they look uncannily like Broom Hilda! Okay, so where do we go from here? Fortunately, I have the solution. Let’s go back to basics.
FEMININITY 101
First things first… As Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider say in their book, The Rules: Rule #1 “Be a creature unlike any other.” Men are extremely sensitive to the scent of a woman. She always bathes in an enticingly scented bubble bath. When you shower, use your favorite scented shower gel. Afterward, always use a lightly scented lotion/moisturizer. Your skin will feel soft, smooth and supple. My favorite body washes, lotions, and bubble baths come from the Bath & Body Shop. They are cheap, smell delicious and last a long time.
Second, being a creature unlike any other means you have to shave your legs every day, no matter what. You’re sure to turn your partner off if you look even remotely like Grizzly Adams! Ladies, you should shave your legs yourself or have them waxed by a professional; the same applies to the armpits. I highly recommend the bikini waxes. My favorite is the Brazilian wax.
Third, if you’re the type to wake up and leave the house without combing your hair, stop, don’t pass, go! You’re scaring the hell out of your neighbors, not to mention turning your man off. Always strive to look well groomed, even if it means simply putting your hair up in a fancy bun or ponytail. If you have the money, I suggest making regular appointments with a stylist to have your gray colored, roots colored, and hair cut. You’ll not only look better, you’ll feel sexy. For those of you on a budget, there are plenty of do-it-yourself hair coloring systems.
Try experimenting with Ellen & Sherrie’s rule of being a creature unlike any other for a week. I guarantee that you will immediately feel the difference! Last but not least, manicures and pedicures are a must. If you can’t afford to go to a nail salon, buy your own nail paraphernalia. You’ll find a variety of nail paraphernalia at Duane Reade or K-mart for $3.99 or less. Get a manicure and pedicure. All of the above actions explain self-care. When you follow these guidelines, you will look, feel, and act like a woman.
Your partner will start looking at you differently, because their testosterone will have kicked in! Then you can start acting maddeningly shy! It will be a tiger.
Until next time, remember, if you want your man to be “crazy about you” and not mad at you, take good care of yourself, maintain your femininity at all costs, and look your best, if not all the time, then most of the time. time.