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If you have a child, specifically a tween or teen, there is a chance your child will find body piercing fascinating; If your son is into body jewelry, you can bet he’s going to be faced with a barrage of requests to allow him to get pierced.
From a parent’s perspective, I understand the initial concern: my child…wants…a body piercing!? What about getting a job? What if he gets a disease? Is my child starting to go down the “wrong path”? Is this the beginning of the end? …etc.
Parents, this article will help put your mind at ease. I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum, so I understand both points of view. The first thing to keep in mind is that your child is going through that “rebellious” stage (and don’t lie to yourself, to one degree or another, you went through it too). In an effort to distinguish themselves as individuals, children seem to have an uncanny ability to use the things that bother them the most to achieve their goals of “independence.” Your son is also part of the generation where the media has infiltrated every aspect of his life, and more specifically, the celebrity-worshipping portion of our pop culture is at an all-time high. If your child’s favorite celebrity has a belly piercing, rest assured, she’ll only add fuel to her fire. Lastly, children this age are very conscious of his appearance and want to use their bodies as a means of self-expression. Instead of painting peace signs on their cheeks (as was done in the ’60s), teens can now have nostril piercings to stand out from the crowd.
Independence, self-expression, and cultural influences affect every generation, but each generation finds its own way to add a twist to these themes.
There is also one more thing to add: at this stage, your child is also trying to “take” some power from you, that is, he is trying to restore the system of government within the house. It’s part of growing up. If your teen really wants a body piercing and you say no, she’ll probably go out and get it anyway. In their mind, they have just outgrown your rule and thus you are little by little less the boss of them, and you start to lose your influence and control.
Now, there are benefits to allowing your teen to get a piercing. Although as parents we want to shelter and protect our children from the injustices of the world, this mentality is not in the best interest of the children. Once your teen gets a piercing, she may have to learn to sacrifice: For example, while she loves her lip piercing, if she wants that summer job at the bank to pay for a car, she may have to take it out. They are then faced with a choice: they can keep the piercing and be poor, or they can remove the piercing and be rich. Life is full of tough decisions, and body piercings are a pretty reasonable way to illustrate that point.
Here’s a way to get to a happy medium. Let’s say your teenage daughter wants a belly button ring because “it’s cute and everyone has one.” Instead of saying a direct “no,” sit down and have a conversation. You and your child need to address those questions and concerns that are on your mind (for more information on body piercing, check out any of my other articles – I have covered a wide variety of issues and aspects of body piercing). You must also state in clear and not uncertain terms who is going to pay for it. If she wants her son to pay for the piercing, she will gain a greater understanding of the true value of money, that is, she will have to work to get what she wants. If the boy pays for the piercing, she will also invest more in caring for the piercing, which will teach her more about responsibility and personal health hygiene.
If you want to pay for the piercing, maybe you can have your son work for it. One very popular (and highly effective) method is to allow your child to get a body piercing IF they score high on the honor roll or only get A’s on their report card. It’s a win-win situation: your child will get excellent grades (which have long-term effects) and receive a piercing as a reward.
Just Between Us Adults: When it comes to employment, body piercing doesn’t affect employment like it used to. Google and other corporate businesses, for example, don’t have a dress code policy, which includes tattoos and piercings. In some of these large, corporate companies, body piercing is not an issue. In fact, more and more businesses are perfectly fine, if not downright encouraging, body piercing.
It’s still true that in other jobs body piercings are a problem, but the beauty of piercings is that they can be removed. For temporary removal, a “retainer” can be purchased (it’s clear and slides into the piercing so the hole doesn’t close up); it is impossible to see and the piercing can still be used outside of work. Unlike tattoos, piercings are not permanent. If a piercing is removed, no one will see the old hole. This could be a very viable option for your child!
Taking your child to a professional piercing salon will greatly minimize the chance of illness and infection; Put this way, if your child wanted a wart or skin tag removed, would you rather have him or his friend do it with a razor? Or would you prefer to have it done by a medical professional in a sterile environment? Similarly, if your son really wants a piercing, would you rather have him or his friend try it with a dirty safety pin, or would you rather have a professional do it with clean tools in a sterile environment? That alone is a very compelling reason to allow a body piercing – if it’s going to happen anyway, it had better be safe!
It’s a challenge when kids start to assert their independence through body modifications and decorations, I know. However, I was also that kid who really wanted a piercing and got several without permission (after asking as well). You can bet my parents were mad, but in a way, their reaction touched me. When my mom finally relented and took me to the piercing salon with her approval, I thought my mom was much cooler than the others and much more understanding. Also, once my parents saw the process and understood it, they really didn’t care anymore! They cleared up a lot of the misconceptions about her and realized that it wasn’t a big deal. It was a good experience for everyone. I’m older now, but every day I see children and parents in the same situation: it’s funny how some things always stay the same. Allowing your child a body piercing is a unique and memorable way to build a bridge, which is difficult during the difficult teenage years.
Anyway, if you want to educate yourself on body piercing, the risks, the procedures, how it’s done, etc., please read more of my articles or search the internet (although there are a lot of misconceptions on the internet, so choose your sources wisely). . Simply put, piercing is pretty safe, it’s not permanent, and it’s not something people get ostracized for. It can foster a great relationship between you and your child; it can teach sacrifice, work ethic, financial responsibility, personal health responsibility, and can be an enlightening experience for all involved.