By 
Paul was obsessed with his wife Christy even after 12 years of marriage. He would watch over her if she went grocery shopping, visited her parents, met her friends, and even when she went to see a doctor. The fixation with her wife and everything she did grew with each passing year and Christy began to suffocate under Paul’s anguished obsession. Paul had even stopped traveling due to work commitments so that he could be with his wife as much as possible. Fortunately, Paul was cooperative when Christy convinced him to seek help. His psychiatrist diagnosed him with adult separation anxiety (ASA).
Sometimes childhood separation anxiety continues into adulthood or can develop into adulthood due to past abuse or neglect. ASA can be so overwhelming that a person can have a panic attack when a loved one moves. At other times, when the disease is not so intimidating, there may be other subtle symptoms, such as:
Jealousy – Extreme jealousy manifests itself in people when they fear losing control over a loved one. They trust less, harbor unreasonable doubts and worries, and may also fear infidelity.
strict parenting – Also known as reverse separation anxiety, parents may be so worried that their child will one day leave them that they begin to control the child’s life. The parents become extremely strict and protective as they constantly fear living alone if the child leaves them.
frustrating relationships – Sometimes, despite knowing that a person or a relationship can be bad for physical or mental health, people get stuck. They are afraid to leave as they are constantly anxious that something will go wrong.
wandering – When adult children do not leave their parents’ house or when a friend visits them but does not seem to leave, it is known as mooching.
Ways to manage ASA
To understand the problem, you have to take a close look at a person’s symptoms of separation anxiety, which can include excessive worry about losing things, inexplicable attachment to other people, and sleep disturbances. In the absence of a sufficient diagnostic evaluation for ASA, its treatment is not clinically defined. However, it is possible to control symptoms and gradually overcome intractable anxiety.
- Join support groups – Joining support groups can be very helpful as they offer a platform to connect with people who are in the same boat. Talking and sharing experiences can be very therapeutic and liberating in the long run.
- Practicing relaxation techniques. – It is important to calm the anxious mind and feel relaxed. Yoga, meditation and mindfulness techniques are immensely beneficial. One should try to do activities that you like to distract from unwarranted fears. Walking a pet, strolling through a garden, enjoying dinner with friends, cooking, or reading an inspiring book are some of the ways to stay busy and mentally satisfied.
- to write a diary – Every time you feel anxious, you should write about those feelings in a journal. Writing can help identify feelings and address them when they come up the next time. It is also a great opportunity to assess the response to one’s troubling thoughts and make efforts to reframe them in a positive way.
- taking professional help – Any anxiety disorder can interfere with daily activities and impede personal and professional growth. It also affects relationships and people may not want to associate with someone who is too possessive. To prevent symptoms from getting worse, it is important to get professional support.
ASA recovery is possible
If ASA is not treated in time, one can become obsessed and engage in other negative behaviors. But anxiety can be treated with medication, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and other therapies such as art therapy or dance movement.