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Love language. Is that some special kind of slang that lovebirds speak? Many would feel lost when asked what their love language is, as they may not have given it much thought. However, just like any other language, it is simply their primary way of expressing and interpreting love.
In his book The Five Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman explains the five emotional languages and we can all identify with at least one.
words of affirmation
What you say is of great importance to your partner if this is their way of identifying to love. She might love hearing those “I love you” and “You make me happy” statements that you hold back. Encouragement, verbal appreciation, and praise make some people feel special and loved.
receive gifts
This is for those who value gifts as touching and meaningful. This, of course, can be mistaken for materialism by many, and in such an acquisitive age, they might be partly right. But if your spouse speaks this language, he or she will not only appreciate the gifts, but also the thought and effort behind the gesture. Even something as simple as a pen or a favorite food could brighten his partner’s day.
Quality time
For some, ‘being there’ is what counts. Spending time together is important to the person who speaks this love language. The time you spend together does not have to be occupied with any particular activity like watching a movie. Just enjoying each other’s company, even in silence, fills the person up and makes them feel special and loved.
Acts of Service
Washing the car, ironing, shining shoes… can they be expressions of love? Certainly! The efforts that one will make to ease or lighten the burden of certain responsibilities, of whatever kind, are highly appreciated by those who speak this language of love. Again, this does not mean that the person is lazy; it is simply a gift of love.
physical touch
This doesn’t have much to do with bedroom issues. The person who speaks this language is very touching; he holds hands, hugs, hugs and touches his spouse a lot while interacting. All these gestures communicate love, care and concern.
Know and understand your love language
To learn and understand your own language, ask yourself three important questions.
How do I express love to others? You can, for example, better express your love by giving thoughtful gifts to your loved ones.
What do I ask the most of the people I associate with? You may find that you love to feel appreciated and recognized for what you do.
· What do I complain about the most? You may complain that your partner notices when you do something really well, which highlights your need for recognition.
Ask your spouse the same questions to find out their predisposition as well.
Why you should know your love language
There are many ways we express love for one another, but the five languages listed above make up the key categories that most people identify with. It may feel like you speak everything, but research has shown that while we can identify with everything, most of us speak primarily one love language.
There are many cases of people in relationships feeling unloved, while in the real sense, it could be that their partner does not understand their love language. It is important that you and your spouse know your own and each other’s language in order to love each other on purpose. Understanding your spouse’s language will allow you to love her in a way that she can relate to. It will also help you determine the best way to respond to her when she is feeling down. Maybe she needs a hug or maybe just a few words of love will do. Her inclinations will suggestively determine this.
Once you and your spouse know your own love languages, you should not only share them with each other, but also act on them. However, each of you may need to make small adjustments after learning these truths. Be open to making these adjustments, as they can make a big difference in how they relate to each other. If done right, you should see greater joy and satisfaction in your relationship. And in the bedroom, let’s just say that a new door to practical and powerful sex will be waiting for you!